Fooled Myself

There I was akwardly leaning over the sink in the bathroom with my brand new super duper nifty no fail tweezers (they weren't really new but they were still in the package from being in my Christmas stocking). Did I mention that I am blind as a bat without my glasses? So anyway, there I was tongue out in full concentration mode, when the phone rang.
It Scared the Crap out of me!! I dropped the tweezers after poking myself in the eye. In the process of falling down the unprotected drain in the sink the pointy little end that just minutes earlier I had been so excited about.......after all proper plucking is a lot like surgery, you need precision instruments to do it correctly.......scratched the end of my nose only I didn't really notice because I was actually rushing to get to the phone before it woke up the neighbours baby I was watching. Then of course it was a telemarketer who wouldn't take no for an answer so I said something terribly horribly rude and hung up just as ........wait for it........
AS
the
doorbell
rang.
Baby wakes starts to do the highpitched screaming "Help me I'm being murdered in my sleep get me the Hell out of here I don't know where I am" cry.
that same screaming from the other night when I tried to kill Sarina with the magic potion Trudy sent me.
Now completely deaf, blinded for life, one eye watering fiercely as mascara runs off the cratered planet I call my face, I yank open the door . It was the Present Man...aka UPS...I sign and the guy says "That looks pretty nasty are you okay?"
I gave him the MEAN MUG as I read the addressee...... not me but my neighbours with the yappy dogs. While he points to the end of my nose which is now dripping blood everywhere down my shirt because of those #$@@^^&**!!! state of the art tweezers that are now peacefully residing in the J-bend of the bathroom sink have seriously maimed me all because I tried to save $7.50 plus tip


PS Does anyone know a good plumber?