My No Good Rotten Horrible Stinky Expensive Very Bad Day!

It started like any other day rolling over and fumbling on the nightstand for my glasses. Which weren't there but were on the floor. In pieces. Again. The lens popped out of the frame for the second time this week. So off to the Eye Center I need to go. Again. For the second time this week.
I guess I should be grateful that they are open. Sunday they weren't and I coudn't find my old pair til about 10 pm so I gave myself a really rotten headache. ( This isn't the rotten part...that comes later).
Off and On all day long I kept smelling a funky smell. I took out the trash.
The house still smelled.
I did up the dishes that I dirtied making a killer Potatoe Salad for Family Home Evening at Caldwell's. I ran lemon juice down the disposal. With the kitchen reasonably clean I settle down to read a bit.
Walking by the bathroom there it is again the funky pong that's been eluding me all morning. So like any reasonable woman I shut the door. No go, so I clean the bathroom.
I figure since I cleaned one I might as well clean the other.
I think of going to gawk at the rich folk and go to the Parade of Homes. I decided it's much to hot.
I'm tired I pick up my book again. I talk with Baby Sis on the phone. She's loving her new house and having fun settling in though it's not quite as easy as she'd like. There are trees to water and a lawn to mow.
Welcome to home ownership Sis!
We talk a bit more about nothing...we are sisters after all that happens. She mentions that the the house had a better washer and dryer than theirs so she sold theirs on Craig's List. Then it hit's me!
Maybe the funk is wet clothes left in the washer in hot weather. It's been known to happen before.......especially here. Nothing there or in the dryer. I run through a bit of Pine Sol in the washer anyway. now everything smells clean even if it isn't.
I decide to go get my prescriptions before the pharmacy closes....something I've been dreading all day. Yuck!! the bill was so high!! Almost $300 for 6 little tiny bottles of little tiny pills.
As I pull in I notice that the light in the garage is out again. No bigger I'll get it changed. The new light bulb doesn't work either!! Arrrgggghhh!
As I ponder my next move and go to shut the garage, it hits again, the whiff of a funky ick smell. About the same time I think I don't hear the freezer running I realize why the light's not working.
It was like the shower scene from Physco!!! Brief glimpses jerking harshly into my brain. It's dark, bloated, soggy and drippy all at the same time. I tentatively touch..... nothing is cool to the touch at all. Mold is already thriving. It is a total loss.
I open the door pull the car out and pull the trash barrel in and begin the disgusting task. Putrid meat, squishy veggies, dripping ice cream and 2 lone loaves of moldy bread make their way into the bin. Packaging with chemical reactions to being left in the dark for at least 3 to 4 days of 100 degree weather follow. The first bloated package causually tossed in onto the growing heap exploded, releasing the most unspeakable scent ever smelled into the already polluted evening air.
Outside in the fresher air of the front porch I cried, not wanting to face the rest of the disgusting task. Knowing there is no one but me to do it I go back into to face the fish. The bin was full, i gladly close the lid and roll it outside, realizing that there are 6 more days until the mess inside will be picked up.
Physically unable to reach inside even once more I turn on the Hose and pull the trigger on the sprayer, Hosing down the inside of the freezer. I lather the entire thing with Chlorox Cleaner and hose again. Lather rinse repeat, lather rinse repeat. I open 3 boxes of baking soda from storage and place inside after wiping the inside down with an old towel that I then throw away and wearily take myself to bed.
I told you
it was a no good rotten horrible stinky expensive very bad day.