I keep telling myself it's okay to feel like you are feeling. Sometimes you just need to allow yourself to feel sad without feeling guilty about it. So I'll call my mom and my MIL to wish them a Happy Mother's Day then I plan on wallowing in self pity for pretty much the rest of the day.
Just like I've done every Mother's Day since 1980.
I do really well the other 364 days of the year but this is the day that I deal with the disappointment, pain, sadness and trials of infertility. The helplessness, and grieving of a do it or die hysterectomy. We tried adoption with no success. We tried everything legal. The rest of the year I'll have myself convinced once again that I have no regrets.
Liar! Liar! your pants are on fire!
I will never be a mother. Nobody will ever call me Mom. I will never be anyone’s Nana or Gigi. No one will ever feel obligated visit me today in the care center. So I don't do Mother's Day. I wallow. That's how I choose to deal with it.
Poor poor pittiful me.
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And guess what you deserve to wallow....you my dear have been "Mom" to many, you have inspired loved, cherished and uplifted many around you and I am one of them. So on this day happy mom day to you I love you and cherish the fact that I get to know and learn from you.
{{hugs}} to you, dear.
Wallow away ;)
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