a Little Holiday Humor

I just love posting funny stuff so just for fun I thought I'd pass this list I got from my friend Allison along. Hey Al....Is it snowing in Price too?

Holiday Eating Tips:

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-aholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on.. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Say the phrase "This means something" really serious like Richard Dryfuess in cClose Encounters of the Third Kind. Then Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have SOME standards.
10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.
Remember this motto to live by:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, totally worn out and screaming, "WOO HOO what a ride!"

I should also mention that Allison was PG for the whole 9 months and only gained about 10 pounds the entire time. Miss Julia is 5 months old.

Chloe's blog

Chloe has her own blog now. She begged and pleaded til I finally gave in. She was becoming quite unbearable to live with. What she thinks she has to write about I'll never know. Emma, Serina and Alyssa ought to get a kick out of it though.

Turkey Day

Since tommorrow is Thanksgiving I decided to think about what I have to be thankful for today. sort of to put me in the graditude mood. So in no particular order at all........
I'm thankful
that I have the family I do.
for the little switch that allows me instant heat on cold chilly mornings like today.
for sweaters and slippers. ( see above)
that all I have to do is ask and I'm taken care of.
that Marie made it to the finals on DWTS way to go!! Two church members get to compete!
that the cornbread I made yesterday...yes I did it again and actually baked...turned out so I can make cornbread stuffing that I can eat and enjoy.
for Craig taking the Christmas box to Washington with him so I can save money on shipping.
that Heidi gets to keep her foot and is doing a little better.
that Emma provides me such entertainment.
that I knew and loved my Frog and that he loved me.
for the Gospel of Jesus Christ that helps me from going crazy missing the Frog because I know that I will see him again.
for my truly dear friends, they encourage and inspire me, plan my social life, clean my gutters and treat me like family.
for my Smurf-mobile...gas is currently $3.11 a gallon and he sips it slowly.
for Pumpkin custard...it smells so good baking
for screwdrivers and the helpful guy at the Hardware store who kept looking til we found the right faucet handle to fix my leaky shower.
for my new church callings that will give me a social life wether I want to have one or not. LOL

My life is really packed full of blessings

Primary Sharing Time

This has been a really crazy weekend. Early Saturday morning I got up and made lots and lots of hashbrowns. Then it was off to the church house for our Teacher Appreciation Breakfast that I'd made the invitations for last week. A quick trip to the store and it was back to the church in time for the Primary Ice Cream Social for all the kids who had gotten the Articles of Faith memorized and passed off. We had 6 kids who had gotten all 13 done! Woo Hoo!! The youngest was 5yr old Elizabeth, she passed off 3 to me just that morning. Way to go! Trisha got an extra Marachino Cherry on her Banana Split since she was the first to pass them all off.
I was a bit worried that there would be a bit of jealousy from the popsicles group but we gave the Bananas their own special table and everyone still had alot of fun and no one did they "hey they got more" bit. They all seemed to understand that next year if they want the whole sundae they need to pass more off.
Sunday it was off to Sacrament Meeting then I had to do Sharing Time in Primary. I took Chloe in her Pilgrim outfit ( here she is last fall with little Myles) We talked about how nice it was not to be whipped or persecuted for our beliefs and some of the things that make us grateful to be members like learning the stories and songs in Primary.
Then we played Shower Ball the whole rest of the time. Later I asked Trisha what she had learned and she said "when you're having fun so is everyone else" which probably wasn't the point I should have been making but they all sit so still for Sacrament Meeting that I can't bear for them to have to sit and listen to me and the actual class lessons too. It's hard for me and I'm old. They all had fun though I changed the rules a bit and didn't make them put on the robes, or towels to answer they did get squirted when they missed the questions or the basket.
Then last night it was back to the meeting house for Priesthood Preview with the 11 yr old boys.
It's funny I'm still not very comfortable but I really love these little folks. I can act silly and they don't judge, they just go along with me wherever I lead. It's only been a few weeks but I'm sooo going to miss them when I'm released.